It’s Friday. Not yet end of my week. I never really thought I would end up coming to work at 11am. Don’t get me wrong, it was our new time in and I don’t know how to feel about it. Nevertheless, I am writing right now! And flashing back from my last post where I was at home, in my spacious room, alone, beside the window in Cebu. Right now, I am also beside a window, in a small desk topped at my bed, the fifth person sharing in one room, here in Mandaluyong.
Oh how I long to write again, please let me write. I love the sound right now of how I’ve been pressing the keyboard in my 4-year old laptop. Or maybe I am writing right now because I cried from one episode of the series I’m watching. Or maybe the iced coffee I had from dinner that made me awake this late. Or yet, maybe from the song that I’m listening to.
My thoughts right now are all mixing in. Am I really effective in my work because I have been editing archival photos for days now and I feel like days have been passing by so fast? Can find another place to transfer this November after my contract ends for 3 months, and after transferring to different places? Am I just homesick because my sister will go back to Cebu tomorrow and I will be left alone again? When will I start doing my backlogs that are not related at work? Or I’m just worried about a lot of things?
That’s why God has been teaching me over and over again. Especially at times when I feel so paranoid at things. He wanted to increase my faith in His promises. He wanted me to relax and surrender everything (yes, even how I’m worried about the pimple popping at the tip of my nose), I will tell Him everything and I know, He will take care of me.
“6 Don’t worry about anything, but pray about everything. With thankful hearts offer up your prayers and requests to God. 7 Then, because you belong to Christ Jesus, God will bless you with peace that no one can completely understand. And this peace will control the way you think and feel.” Philippians 4:6-7